Please be nice peeps.

I know that with this amazing makeover, I was probably going to get some readers who have never read this blog before. We are pretty light-hearted individuals and we like to have fun. We are pretty honest individuals, and would never want anyone to win when they shouldn't. But here is the thing, this make-over, however silly and seemingly un-important it may be to many, it means something to Mike and I. He has seen a very sad wife for the last few months. From October through December, I am not a happy and positive person. Our hearts ACHE at the thought of not having Lilly and Ryker. Each of the women in that have been nominated is very special in her own individual way. Like I have said, although I would LOVE to win, I know that whoever will win is well-deserving. But there are a lot of people that care about us that are hoping I will win (i.e. my sister-in-law has contacted her friends, who are contacting their friends, and so on, hoping to make this dream come true!) For those of you who know me, I REALLY am not a vain person. But to be able to have this chance of a lifetime has made me happier then I have been in a LONG time. Most of you are not there when I am crying in Mike's lap, after the overwhelming feelings of never being blessed with children on this earth is entertained in my mind. Most of you do not see me when I can not get out of bed, on those rare occasions when I feel as if nothing could possibly be right in this world again. Most of you do not see me when I am so angry about my infertility and the hopelessness of adoption sets in. Yes, I have two PERFECT babies, and yes I have an amazing husband and some awesome friends and family that help lift me up. But we have been through literal HELL the last 2 1/2 years. We dealt with facing never seeing Lilly alive on this earth. We were blessed with a bit of time. We faced the HELL of seeing your 5 day old baby so swollen that he has fluid pulling off to the side of his head, paralyzed because his little chest had to stay open to allow for his heart to continue to decrease its swollen size. The HELL of walking into your 3 week old baby's pediatric intensive care room and seeing massive amounts of blood coming out of his sore little bum and being vomited out, and after 4 hours of emergency surgery, just so pale and weak. And then 4 weeks later, having to tell the doctors to stop the life-saving measures because it had been almost an hour since you baby's oxygen SATS had been above 20%. Once you have buried your two infants, just one year and 3 weeks apart, one only one week before Christmas, than, and only than can you begin to start to tell us what to say on this blog, or what not to. I am a sensitive soul. You who know me know this about me. I am even more sensitive about my husband's sweetness and feelings. So all I can say is that if you would like to make a comment, BE NICE! I really do not want to take this blog private, but I will do what I have to to protect my family. So play nice, or forever hold your peace! If I have offended, I am sorry. But this blog is to share the good, the bad, and the ugly that we face. Mike posts RARELY, and when he does, he likes nice supportive comments to be written. So please be kind, we are all fighting some kind of battle. It makes me upset that at such a happy time, that Mike's feelings are injured. So be kind all of you. We are nice people too!